Friday, March 14, 2014

You Gotta Put Down the Newspaper...

So many bad drivers are out there on the roads and it is getting worse.

Today, around nine a.m., be glad you were not heading south on Wekiva Springs Road. My wondering eyes saw a van of a certain age (maroon in color, one of those awful designs by Detroit that look like angry kitchen appliances) and behind the wheel was a large open newspaper. Truly, there was no driver in sight. Until, at the light at East Lake Brantley Drive, the van pulled alongside my car. There, behind the newspaper I guessed it, a person. She was reading the newspaper as if she had been sitting at home in her barcolounger, and as if the road were not filled with traffic not to mention walkers, joggers and bikers. The article she was reading must have been gripping because she sat there with the fully opened newspaper blocking all but say a sliver of sky where (presumably) the traffic light could be glimpsed. And when the light changed, she sailed on like a rudderless ship. I was very very very very glad I was a) in the other lane and b) not related to her by blood or marriage. Oh yes I did see a CAR SEAT (!) in the van. Pity the poor child with that idiot for a mother!

Please, friends, put down the:
- Newspaper
- Map
- Phone
- Cigarette
- Pipe
- Makeup
- Meal
- (Did I mention phone?)
- Ducky

And just drive.

The life you save will be your own.

P S I refrain from posting the license plate of that van. But I don't promise not to do so in future. In the mealtime here is a good description of the woman who was driving without watching where she was going. 30ish. Dishwater blond hair pulled back from her head like she was trying to do a home-made facelift and tied with a scrunchie, nearly no makeup. White (well, it was white once) long-sleeved ill-fitting tee shirt top (remember: "Support can be beautiful", dearie!). Unflattering reading glasses. Receding chin. Boney elbows. Pasty completion.

Too bad I didn’t get a better look at her...!!!

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